Dazzle Me

I haven’t been here in a while. Life has been all over the place.

Work wise, I have taken a weird upwards and sideways step? I am a lead, but not in the area I want to be. Its good experience though, so it’s not a bad thing. It was rather unexpected though.

In my personal life, S and I have made the decision to open up our relationship and give the poly life a try. Over time I came to the realization I can’t be all the things he needs out a partner. Specifically sexually. My drive is lower than his and there are things that despite wanting to do, I can’t mentally get myself there.  I want him to have these things, even if it’s with someone else. For me, I need more of a touching relationship. One where I can just be held? I am open to sex and stuff, but mostly just cuddling.

I have a crush on a friend and I have no idea if I should tell him, or even how I would. Would be feel the same? Would they not be ok with the poly thing? It’s weird to be in this situation after 10 years.


New adventures ahoy!